Your Level or Mine?

I have discovered one limiting factor that keeps people from engaging with a life coach or health advocate like me is the misconception and fear that I am going to beat them over the head and tell them that everything they are doing is wrong. Sorry to disappoint, but that notion is simply wrong.

First, allow me to explain that an effective life coach meets you where you are - your current level of thinking and state of being. Then through strategic questioning and discussion, a life coach is able to help you identify your own challenges and their underlying causes. Some of these challenges may be obvious to you and others may be right in front of your face, yet unrecognizable due to your pre-programming or belief system. While working with a life coach many simple shifts and small changes are revealed that can make profound changes in your present and future life. The greatest successes of a life coaching program are when you have your own “Ah-ha!” moments. When YOU create the change you want to see in your life and your world – the results are much more profound.

On the health advocate side, I would never insult the intelligence of my clients by telling them that smoking is bad for their health. Anyone smart enough to pick up the phone and call me already knows that. And I know from experience that until someone is truly ready to quit smoking, it is a futile effort for me to engage in such a battle with them. The route I choose to take is to introduce positive practices to counteract the negative effects of a bad habit. What I’ve found is that the good feelings from the positives quickly begin to outweigh the interest in the negatives, thus leading to voluntary cessation of the bad habit. My philosophy is that if you are going to do something bad, then do several REALLY good things to counteract it. Simple breathing exercises, hydration, nutrition and movement can help counteract the negative effects of the 10¹⁶ amount of free radicals inhaled in one cigarette.

Vegetarianism – Often we ridicule, deny or question that which we do not understand. I’ve found that people are extremely defensive when it comes to their eating habits. The first comment I often hear when people discover that I’m a vegetarian is “I can’t do that…” First of all, there is no place for the word ‘can’t’ in anyone’s language. Secondly, what people don’t know is that I spent the first 21 years of my life as a staunch “meat-and-potatoes” guy who refused to eat anything green! It took some drastic signs (both positive and negative) to shift my mindset and make me commit to a lifetime of vegetarianism. I’m here to tell you that if I CAN do it, you CAN too! But once again, I refuse to enter into a ‘battle’ with a client who is not ready to make the change.

If eating meat is where you’re at and you’re not ready to change, then I implore you to focus on the quality of meat you consume. Is it healthy? Is it organic? Is it free range? Is it free from toxins, drugs, steroids and un-natural feed? If you followed it from the plate back to the farm would you feel good about the process? The first objection and limitation for many is simply the price of buying organic, healthy foods. Do you know why organic costs more? Because it’s worth it!!! Quality costs more – plain and simple. Focus on quality and not quantity - for it’s the quantity that also gets many of us in trouble! When you eat healthy foods, they contain more nutrients per serving unit – therefore, you don’t have to eat (or buy) as much, thus equaling out the price! It’s an interesting concept – try it on for ‘size’ (no pun intended)!

Another misconception about life coaches is that they are counselors who want to re-hash the past and delve into the source of previous problems. While history and experience are often the best educators and predictors of the future, it is not usually productive to live in the past. We are all products of our past, but the future will be a product of what we do right now. A good life coach will help you understand where you are right now and where you want to be in the future - and then help you pave the road to success, your goals and your dreams.

If you want a better life, then understand you may have to make changes – some may be simple shifts, other may be massive mindset adjustments. I cite Einstein’s definition of insanity: “To continue doing the same things the same way, but expect different results.” I say, don’t be insane – make change! I’m here to help you.

Recipe for Resolution

Happy New You - For those who made or want to make New Year’s resolutions, I have a special recipe to help you do it successfully. For the month of January, I will be posting my “Recipe for Resolution” on my blog and offering discounts on personal coaching packages. Whether you want to lose weight, find happiness, become more successful or just feel better – I will help you make 2011 the most positive, profitable and productive year of your life.

1. The first and most important step in the resolution process is to make the conscious decision to change. Ignite the fire internally and set your desire into motion. Flip the switch that mentally turns on a new you. Decide to make immediate, definite, effective, lasting changes in your life. Commit to doing things differently - remember Einstein’s definition of insanity: “To continue doing things the same way, but expect different results.” Know that new effort and changed direction will take you to new destinations. Resolve to make change today. 
2. Change your vocabulary – permanently remove the following words: “Can’t, try, maybe, consider, and eventually” – and replace them with “Can, will, definitely, resolve, and now.” Be cognoscente of your language daily – are you speaking with empowering words or are you subconsciously limiting yourself with your own vernacular?  Change: “Maybe I’ll eventually consider trying to change, but right now I can’t.” To: “Now I will definitely resolve to change because I can do whatever I put my mind to.”
3. Create a mantra to repeat to yourself. Examples: “I will make every minute of every day productive in some kind of way” or “2011 is gonna be heaven” or maybe “I’m going to fit into my favorite jeans again.” Make a habit of saying this mantra throughout the day. This activity will keep you focused and motivated toward your resolution.
4. Imagine your life vividly 1, 5, 10 years from now and make mental and written notes as you see yourself. Use these notes to create a “dreams list” of all the things you would have in your life if time, money, fear, experience, location and all the normal limiting factors were not present in your life. Imagine how much easier it would be to make resolutions and create new dreams with a professional life coach on your 'team'. Visit my coaching page for more.
5. Forget about all of the things that you ‘have’ to do on a daily basis and think about all of the things that are truly important to you. Make a “priorities list” of the things most important in your life in the order of their importance (time and health should be tops on the list). It’s okay to be a little selfish here – this is YOUR list. My philosophy is that “If you put yourself as your own highest priority and maximize your own life first, then you will have abundant health, energy, love, success and money to share with others – plus, you get to lead them by example. The alternative is to neglect yourself, break down, get sick, lose your job, your energy, your youth, your vitality and then become a burden to those around you – as they will have to take care of you!” Here is an example of the top 5 things on my priorities list:
   1.      Health – maintaining optimum health, increasing energy, preventing disease and slowing aging so that I can live a long, productive life.
   2.      Time – making the absolute most of every day – making every minute productive in some kind of way.
   3.      Positivity – maintaining a positive attitude at all times – even in the face of adversity
   4.      Accomplishing Goals – reading and revising my to-do list, goals list and goals accomplished list daily - revising when necessary
   5.      Father - Be a great role model and provider for my daughter and future children. 
6. Take a good look at your schedule and calendar. Think about your daily routine and how you spend your time. Is your time allocation congruent with your priorities list? Many people I coach say that their health, GOD or family are their top priorities, but after a coaching session, they realize that their time is not indicative of their priorities – for instance, they realize that they spend 40 hours at work, another 10 hours getting ready for and traveling to work, 14 hours watching TV, 60 hours sleeping, 11 hours are spent goofing-off or time that cannot be accounted for. On their top priorities, they spent less than 2 hours working out or exercising, less than 4 hours of true quality time with the family and only 1 hour at church. My life-coaching can help you get your life in balance and find “extra” time to do the things that are high on your priority list.
7. Now that you have made the mental commitment, empowered your vocabulary, created a mantra, envisioned your dreams, listed your priorities and looked at your schedule – it’s time to set some realistic goals. Make each goal measurable and attainable with a completion date. Use smaller “stair-step” goals to reach larger ones – ex: if you want to lose 30 lbs by March 31, make a series of stair-step goals – I will lose 10 lbs by January 31, 10 more pounds by Feb 28^th, and 10 more pounds by March 31 to achieve my total goal of 30 pounds. Group your goals by personal, business, travel, family etc… List from short term to long term in each category. Most importantly, WRITE THEM DOWN.
8. Go back and review your dreams list and priorities and compare them to your goals list that you created yesterday. Ask yourself “Are my goals congruent with my priorities, dreams and how I actually spend my time?” Revaluate your goals, priorities and dreams in relation to one another and make additions, subtractions and changes in your timeline or order of importance if necessary. This area is a life coach's specialty – having a coach on your team or personal “board of directors” can be beneficial and profound.
9. Important step – read your goals list every day. Make your goals list a Word Document that is saved and resides prominently on the desktop of your computer. If you like paper better, print it out and tape it to the fridge or put it somewhere that you are sure to see it multiple times throughout the day. Form a habit of reading your goals list at least once a day – this will keep fire in your desire. 
10. Identify the difference between a goal and a task. A goal is a destination, a big picture dream, desire, want, need, etc… A task is something you do to reach a goal and is only a step on the staircase to the goal… The bigger the goal, the higher the staircase. Tasks are part of the plan of action that gets you to where you want to be.
11. Mid month checkup – review your accomplishments so far this month. Are you happy with your progress? How many goals have you crossed off of your list? Have you read your goals list daily? Have you organized your priorities? Did you write down your dreams? Did you take a close look at your schedule and re-assess your time and how you spend it? If you are happy with your progress, then good for you – you are on your way to implementing powerful resolution. If you have room for improvement, then go back to step one and repeat – it’s never too late to start, but time is precious and there will only be one NOW. Focus your efforts on what you can control and do it today!
12. Create plans of action. Dreams are your thoughts, priorities are your world, goals are your destinations and the plan of action is the detailed series of tasks or the navigation system and roadmap that gets you to your destinations. Start with your top priority goals and make a detailed plan of action for each. Example: Top priority health goal may be to lose 30 pounds by March 31^st. Break this goal into more measurable and manageable stair-step goals – I will lose 10 lbs per month Jan, Feb and March. Plan of Action – Join the gym and workout a minimum of one hour per day there – exercise to include cardio (bike, treadmill and aerobics), nautilus and free weights. Stop eating fast food immediately and permanently. Take a 30 minute walk on my lunch break. Take a hot yoga class twice a week and visit the sauna on days that I don’t do yoga. Shop healthy – buy fresh organic fruits and veggies. Eat 6 to 8 healthy meals a day and consume portion sizes smaller than my fist. Limit couch time and TV watching to only one hour per night. Each of these tasks or mini-resolutions are part of a detailed plan of action that will lead you to accomplishing your bigger goal. Remember, the most important part of a plan of action is the ACTION!
13. Lucky #13 – My definition of Luck: “when chance meets opportunity - and you recognize it, and most importantly, capitalize on it”. Always keep your senses open and pay attention to the signs. Resolve to create your own luck daily! 
14. Review your plan(s) of action for your top goals and create a daily minute-by-minute schedule and incorporate time for your all of your new plan of action items. Using recipe #12’s weight loss goal and plan of action as an example: Monday, 6:15 am – wake up, read goals list, drink one liter of water, put on gym clothes. Monday, 7:00 am join the gym. Monday 7:10 to 8:30 am workout- stationary bike 20 minutes, nautilus equipment and free weights 40 minutes, sauna and stretch 20 minutes. Monday 8:30 to 9 – shower, drive to work, eat an apple on the way. Monday 10:30 am – eat a banana. Monday 12 noon – take a 20 minute walk, eat a prepared  salad from home on the picnic table outside of office. Monday 12:45 practice breathing exercises and rebound/stretch for 5 minutes. Monday 2:30pm – eat an avocado at my desk. Monday 5:30pm – stop at grocery store on the way home to buy fresh produce. Tuesday and Thursday 6:30-8pm – Hot Yoga. This is just a basic outline of a schedule for one plan of action – try to account for every minute of your day (even sleep time). The more detailed your schedule the better – the detail and practice of scheduling may seem excessive, but remember – you are forming new habits and taking control of your time, life and health so that you can reach your ultimate goals.  Stick to your schedule daily – remember to incorporate reading your goals list daily into your schedule. After approximately 21 days of doing this, you will find that the new items on your schedule will become new habits in your life. Your time (and health) are the two most important things in the world – give yourself 10% of your best time each and every day and you will find that the other 90% of your time will be exponentially more productive (you will even sleep better at night knowing that you lived your day to its fullest).
15. Delegation – form “partners”, advisors or “board members” to help you accomplish tasks that you are not necessarily good at. These advisors will also hold you accountable to your goals and commitments. 
16. Create a daily “to-do” list based on your plan of action items and schedule – read it along with your goals list every morning when you wake up and every night before you go to sleep.
17. Create a “goals accomplished list” and a “to-done” list – when you complete a task or accomplish a goal, highlight it and cut it from your goals list or to-do list and then paste it over to the goals accomplished or to-done list.
18. Example – Dream list #1 is to be able to fit into your wedding dress or the bikini you wore on your honeymoon 15 years ago. Priority list #1 is Health. Goal #1 is to get into better shape by losing 20 pounds by January 31, 2011. Plan of Action – join Gold’s Gym, join Hot House Yoga, order TrimULean supplement on monthly autoship. Go to Golds Gym 3 days a week, Hot House Yoga 3 days a week, walk every morning Mon-Fri. Schedule – Monday, Jan 3^rd 5:15pm – go to Gold’s Gym after work and join. Monday, Jan 3^rd 7:30pm go online and order trimulean. Monday Jan 3^rd 10pm – read goals list and to-do list.
19. Checklist – create an excel spreadsheet and assign daily tasks and point values to each of your routine daily tasks. Check off each daily task as you do it. Example: Drink water quota, Eat an avocado, 45 minutes of cardio workout, take TrimULean supplement twice, 1 hour of family time…
20. Habits – it takes 21 days to form a new habit, but it takes a second of thought plus willpower to break an old or bad habit. Resolve to make positive change in your life. Remember Einstein's definition of insanity: "To continue doing the same things the same way, but expect different results".